Biggest life block ever

Gah. Now i'm stuck in my own mind.

Well, the only things i'm good at are pretty much just reading and watching Anime, so the pathways of life for me are kind of narrow. I.AM.COMPLETELY.STUCK.

I've played with the idea of becoming a nutritionist a few times, but it always put me off. The idea of studying about saturated fats and all that double bonds stuff is like a hell for me. Still, its on my list of "What i am going to do".

Just yesterday i toyed with the idea about becoming a Japanese to English translator since the Market is huge. But there were 2 things standing in my way. COMMUNICATION and LEARNING.

First of all, my chinese sucks big time. And since most of the japanese language focuses on kanji, its pretty much setting me up for failure. However i would probably learn it anyway, and my ratio of motivation for chinese to motivation for Japanese is pretty much 1:20.

Then suddenly i go on this downward spiral which basically just makes me think "Fuck this. I'll just study and get to japan." which is kinda unrealistic, especially if you love money and security like i do.

So now i'm like "Should i just study a field that would easily get me a job in Japan?" Or "Work in Singapore then buy stuff from Japan?".

But the second option pretty much deflates as soon as i take a walk around the place. I think what i'm looking for is a out-of-your-native-country experience. And it doesn't hurt that my dream destination is Japan.

Now i am resorting to looking at Websites which display jobs in Japan (Gaijinpot) and am now thinking of being a kindergarten teacher. See how my mind works?

Sigh......i hate myself sometimes. :(